Things You Can Only Say On Thanksgiving

They might be taken outta context on other days of the year!

1. Talk about a huge breast!

2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

3. It's Cool Whip time!

4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!

5. That's one terrific spread!

6. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat.

7. Are you ready for seconds yet?

8. Its a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!

10. Don't play with your meat.

11. Just spread the legs open & stuff it in.

12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?

13. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!

14. You still have a little bit on your chin.

15. How long will it take after you stick it in?

16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up!

17. Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!

18. That's the biggest one I've ever seen!

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Big Engine Goes Country

Had a great time hangin' with the bikers Sunday at the Crankin' it for Hospice Run in Daytona Beach. Those high energy rock n roll boys outta Jacksonville, Big Engine, were kickin' it all afternoon. About two hours in, they countrified it and on the spur of the moment, I shot a video with my still camera. Hope you enjoy it.

Big Engine does David Allen Coe

Monk Gets a Haircut, Then Boots Gets One, Too.

Thanks to the chemo and steroids over the past nine months, my hair's thinned and comes out in clumps whenever I brush it. It's been drivin' me crazy and since my last stint in the hospital in June I swore I was gonna cut it all off. But I hadda little problem. My three-and-half-year-old grand daughter, Peyton, was mortified of "Poppi' cuttin' his ponytail off."
Well, a couple of weeks ago, she gave me "permission" to cut it off. "It's okay, Poppi. You can cut it off," she said. "I'll have a pony-tail for both of us."
Now was a new problem. Who's gonna cut it? Plus, since I hadn't hadda haircut in over twelve years (not counting getting fifteen inches cut off with a USMC K-Bar three years ago at one of our Locks of Love benefits) ...

... I was just a little leery about gittin' it cut. Shoot, I haven't been in a barber's chair in over ten years so who do I trust to cut my hair and not make me look like a dork or, worse, just another run of the mill over fifty biker dude?

Well, a couple of weeks ago we ran into a couple of readers -- Doug and Patti who we've seen around a few times at Bike Week, Leesburg and other biker parties -- at one of our events and we found out Patti's a beauty consultant, hair dresser, everything-to-do-with your appearance diva and she said she could definitely do me right. So on Saturday, November 8th Boots and I took a ride over to Mt. Dora to do the deed. I had the courage, the permission from Peyton, the confidence in Patti, so what the hell?! She went to work ...


And I'm totally happy! She hooked me up and no more brushin' out clumps of hair every morning or night! I combed it yesterday and no hair came out! Same thing today. Anyhow, here's a picture the day after (below - Nov. 9th - we went to the Volusia County Fair with our grand kids and Boots took a picture of me with Junior, our newest and youngest grandchild):

Well Boots was impressed with Patti's creativity, style and what-have-yous as she worked her magic on me and she's not been happy with her look for a while. Even more so since she's been in the friggin' wheel chair with her busted leg for two months now. So while Patti's workin' on me, Boots is askin' her, "Whatcha think you could do to make me look more like me? I'm sassy, mouthy, confident, and my own woman."
Bottom line? Patti had some free time, Boots had the inclination and so Boots ended up gettin' a haircut, too. Here's what Boots looked like a week prior with Peyton on Halloween:

Well, Boots didn't exactly get a haircut, but I'm a guy and I don't know all the artsy-smartsy stuff you call stylin' or hair dressin' or whatever. But Boots looked great afterwards and it sure gave her back a bit of sass and confidence that's been ebbin' a little low lately.

And then she was finished up:

All I can say is, "Patti ... you're definitely a magician!" And I don't know nuthin' about all that other stuff you can do, too. The stuff you and Boots were talkin' about regarding extensions, coloring, yada yada yada - but I'll bet my ass you're the best at that, too.
On the way home, Boots told me, "Honey, I can't believe what a great job she did, and at incredible prices."
Whaddaya mean, Babe?" I asked (remember, I'm a guy who ain't had a haircut in over ten years and I ain't got a clue how much this stuff normally costs).
"I couldn't've gotten my haircut for what she charged for you and I together! And I definitely know I wouldn't've gotten near this great look. You know I've been unhappy since my local hairdresser moved a couple of years ago. Patti's good! I'm glad we ran into 'em at Biketoberfest at Trader Jack's!"
And yesterday I took Boots' picture with Junior, too. How 'bout that?! Not bad. In fact, pretty freakin' awesome if ya ask me.

So I hereby confer the coveted Dixie Biker Recommended tag on Patti. She's awesome. And lest you think I do this lightly, Patti's shop is over ninty minutes away from where we live. It's definitely worth the trip.
If you're interested, she works in Mt. Dora, about thirty minutes northwest of Orlando at:

Wanna look hot for Toy Runs, Christmas or New Year's Eve? Patti can hook you up! You can give her a call at 352-551-7465 or visit a webpage about her here or e-mail her at pattiwacker@comcast.net

Picture's Worth a Thousand Words

Veterans Day

A HUGE thanks to all our Veterans - past and present - for all the sacrifices and hardships y'all endure to ensure our freedom and way of life. Without your efforts we wouldn't enjoy the privilege of Ridin' Free!

Grizzly Adams Visits Deadwood Saloon

On Saturday and Sunday, November 1 & 2, 2008, Dixie Biker Illustrated sponsored a Poker Run and benefit for Rochelle's Boots on the Ground at The Deadwood Saloon in Ormond Beach. The run was put together pretty quickly and the poker runs on Saturday had about sixty sign ups. Sunday's weather didn't cooperate, but a couple of hundred came out anyhow.

This group is headin' over I-95 on Airport Road in Ormond Beach. We provided maps for the folks on the Poker Runs to avoid traffic, and this is a great way to avoid the traffic on Hwy 1 and Hwy 40 (Granada Blvd.) on the way to country backroads to Trader Jack's Roadside in DeLand. I followed them to Trader Jack's where we had another registration point for the Runs. We only got ten sign ups, but it was a gorgeous day to ride the by-ways. From Trader Jack's the run went up Hwy 11 to Bunnell -- about twenty-five miles of country ridin' with no traffic lights, no stop signs and no traffic. About five miles north of Bunnell is the AmVets Post, the second stop. From there it was a shot over to McHenry's Irish Pub in Flagler Beach, a six mile shot down Oceanshore Blvd, to "The Loop" and back in to The Deadwood Saloon on Hwy 1 in the middle of Daytona's "Ormond Strip." There's lotsa room at Deadwood Saloon for Bikes Only parking and even though there were a couple of hundred bikes, between back yard, front yard, and side yard, they get kinda lost.

Folks hung out doin' what we do: chowin' on an awesome, free BBQ Rib and Chicken dinner with the fixin's provided by Deadwood Saloon and smoked up by Irwin and Rodney. Finger lickin' good, guys. You done great! Live music was provided by Rock n Roll Dundee, and Boots and I gave away a buncha raffle prizes. The winners of the Poker Run Ron Jaffe, owner of Deadwood Saloon - best hand and Linda Wallace - worst hand, won two tickets each to Roscoe's Chili Challenge for next weekend. They both donated their winnings back to RBOTG to be auctioned or raffled off, helping to raise a few more dollars for the cause. Thanks! Below is a group shot of folks that signed a banner to be sent to the 7th Cav serving in Iraq.
Mr. Dan Haggerty, better known to us older folks with TV memories from the 70s, as "Grizzly Adams" - star of the show of the same name, dropped by, hung out with us for a few hours and hadda cold one or three. He graciously posed for pictures---below with Rochelle, left, Boots, middle, and Jade, right---with everyone that asked. He also did a couple of his 'magic' tricks and some sleight of hand that amused everyone.

Ken, Rochelle's grandpa and a USMC vet who is the front man for RBOTG, explained the mission of RBOTG to anyone that asked about it. After explaining to Grizzly Adams, Grizzly graciously made it a point to sign the USMC portion of a banner for our Troops.

Then it was another photo opportunity with Rochelle and Jade (below) with the Grizzly Adams 'ride'. Oh--before I forget: the link above to RBOTG will lead you to their website which has all kindsa good info on how RBOTG started, who it's helped, letters from Troops, and much more.

After signin' a few - and I mean a lot! - more autographs, Dan took off home before the sun set and temps dropped into the fifties. Thanks for the awesome support, bro. You da man! See that, y'all ... you just never know who's gonna show up the Deadwood Saloon or at a Dixie Biker event. With 'Grizzly' if it's about kids or our troops, you can bet he's gonna do his best to ride out, even if it's only to make a 'cameo'. Once again, thanks!

Before Boots and I headied home for the evening, I hadda get a picture of the lovely Gina, below. She'd been bustin' butt all day behind the bar. And I can't forget how fast she was runnin' when suddenly Ronnie said, "Cuervo shots ... three bucks for the next five minutes!" Holy moly. Folks bellied up to the bar, emptied two or three bottles and Gina had her hands full, that's for sure.
Sunday morning dawned cloudy, drizzly and chilly, and the weather worsened during the day. Bummer. We still got a couple of dozen hardy bikers ridin' in, a few from Orlando, Clermont and Lake County - Uncle Bob and Jon - you guys are hard core! - and lotsa folks came in cars and pick ups. It turned out to be a pretty good turnout for such a crappy day. Plus Ronnie had NFL and NASCAR goin' on all his flat screen HD TVs.

With the crummy weather, Ronnie hadda move The Double Barrel Band to the inside stage -- they were originally gonna play on the outside stage -- and we hadda cancel our 'outdoor' bike games. No 'tater in the hay, weenie bite, slow ride, etc. Just too dangerous in the wet and slick conditions. Oh well, we had a great time inside doin' vibrator races, raffles and just hangin' with each other doin' what we do.
Rochelle's Boots on the Ground was set up on the front porch, and we got to meet Brandon and Stacey Peters of Peters Trial Group on Orlando. They're corporate sponsors for RBOTG, along with Winn-Dixie and Orlando Harley-Davidson, and are responsible for us getting on board as another corporate sponsor. Below they're with Ron, owner of Deadwood Saloon, far left, and Jennifer, far right. Jennifer, according to Ken, is a huge asset to RBOTG. She's a volunteer who handles weekend set up. web site editing, bos packing and lotsa 'behind the scenes' stuff for ROBTG. And, to top it off, her husband is currently serving a tour in Iraq with the US Army. Thanks for your efforts and hard work for the Troops, Jennifer!

Around 4:30 we did our last raffle of the weekend and gave a way a buncha Dixie Biker and Deadwood Saloon gear. But everyone was waitin' for the drawing for tickets to Roscoe's Chili Challenge. We drew those last, of course, and the winners were Crazy Horse and Mary, left, and Bob and Babe, right, all of Ormond Beach. Congratulations!

We're gonna do it all over again the last weekend of November. Only this time, we're gonna try and get all of our readers involved. We have nine poker runs startin' in eight cities in North-Central Florida all ending at The Deadwood Saloon. There's more info here: http://www.dixiebiker.com/Events01.html and we'll get a seperate page up with all the event info shortly. The entire weekend, nicknamed "Dang, I'm Sick of Turkey" poker runs and Backyard BBQ oughta be a blast.

We like the Toy Runs, under privleged kids are near and dear to our hearts, but we wanna take care of some heroes that are often taken for granted and forgotten at this time of year: our Troops. These young men and women are off in a foreign land defending what America stands for. We don't care what your politics are, these American Heros deserve our support. Hope to see y'all on Nomember 29th & 30th.

Which Way You Gonna Vote?

We're on the road all weekend doin' our Grand Opening Poker Runs and Party at the Deadwood Saloon in Ormond Beach for Rochelle's Boots on the Ground to send Christmas Packages to our Troops in Iraq and Afghanistan. Here's something we got yesterday that'll get ya thru the weekend.

It's courtesy of Willie and Company, Tropical Tattoo: